In a Relationship with a Narcissist, You Have Two Choices

A RA:WON Playbook blog by Parita Sharma | SEVEE

The Illusion of Love

In a relationship with a narcissist, you don’t get choices that look like love - you get choices that look like survival. You can either surrender - be the puppet in their hands, dancing to their moods, forever feeding their ego, forever being their narcissistic supplier. Or, you can choose yourself - and instantly become the villain in their story.

Because how dare you stop giving? How dare you stop obeying? How dare you stop worshipping someone who never truly saw you?

The Game You Never Signed Up For

Narcissistic relationships are not love stories. They’re performances - scripted, directed, and controlled by one person who feeds off your empathy. At first, they mirror you so perfectly that you believe you’ve found your soulmate. They know your wounds, your fears, your needs - and they use them like chess moves.

You try harder.

You love louder.

You give more.

And in the process, you disappear a little every day.

Until one day, something inside you whispers -

“This isn’t love". "this is not what I deserved."

That whisper is your turning point.

When You Refuse to Play

The day you stop playing the role they assigned you - the doting one, the apologetic one, the “crazy” one - you become the enemy. You start to see the manipulation, the half-truths, the control behind every “I love you.”

They will call you selfish, cold, dramatic. But what they really mean is - you’ve stopped being their supply.

They can’t stand losing control, so they rewrite the story. In their version, they are the victim, and you are the problem.

And yet - walking away from them is not defeat. It’s the bravest act of love you’ll ever perform for yourself.

The Real Victory

The famous dialogue from the movie - Baazigar, “Har ke jeetne waalon ko hi baazigar kehte hai.”And they’ll be right.

Because in this relationship, losing them is how you win yourself back.

You lose their approval, but you gain your peace.

You lose their version of love, but you rediscover your worth.

You lose their story, but you start writing your own.

Winning doesn’t always look like revenge or validation. Sometimes, it looks like silence. Like distance. Like finally breathing without fear.

The Healing

If you’ve ever been in this kind of relationship - where love felt like walking on eggshells and boundaries felt like betrayal — know this: You are not weak for staying, and you are not cruel for leaving. You were conditioned to believe that love means sacrifice, especially in Desi culture — “Log kya kahenge,” “Shaadi mein adjust karna padta hai.” But healing means rewriting those beliefs.

You don’t owe anyone your peace. You don’t owe anyone your silence. And you definitely don’t owe anyone your surrender.

Write Your Own Story

At SEVEE, we believe healing starts with awareness - with seeing things as they are, not as you were told to see them.Join the membership - spaces created for survivors, empaths, and anyone tired of being the “villain” in someone else’s story.

Because you deserve a story that belongs to you. or What'sapp +919712777330 or join

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